A good friend text me last night and asked, "What have you learned about marriage."
I laughed when I received this text, and wasn't even sure I knew where to begin.
The number one and BIGGEST thing I have realized is that the devil works in some mysterious ways. Let's just say, I knew this before, but had no idea the extremes of this statement until recently.
Let me share with you how Conrad and I have decided this.
It was Superbowl Sunday. We woke up, went to church, and went grocery shopping.
Conrad invited three friends over for the game. And the first thing that came into my mind was HOW AM I GOING TO FEED THESE PEOPLE. I have enjoyed being a little homemaker this past month. I love getting out my dishes and making dips and enjoying people in our HOME- but was experiencing some anxiety about pulling this off. I mean its SUPERBOWL SUNDAY! People have high expectations for that day. (This is me making stuff up in my head and causing stress)
We set down at the table to talk about the dips we wanted that day and I asked Conrad what he was going to be doing before our friends came over. He rambled off how he was going to do some work for FKS and get his schedule ready for next week.
I was mad- like you're going to invite friends over and not help me prepare food or clean the house? I felt alone. Like I had to figure all this out by myself. and then I thought- Hey he might want to help. Don't assume. So I asked, "Do you mind unloading the dishwasher?"
SO- he unloaded the dishwasher all while thinking, "Is she serious? My to-do list is up to my neck. She's not grateful, and has no respect for my time or my need." LITERALLY- these words just came from him, I can't make this stuff up people.
Then he says, "I'm going to pray."
I could tell he was frustrated so he went to pray and I cried. Typical girl here. I had no idea what I did wrong, considering I was trying to not assume and seek his help. I mean I even said thank you.
I had no idea his feelings and he had no idea what was going through my mind.
To end this whole ordeal- We both had to separate. Figure out what was really going on. Seek the Lord. Then come together and communicate.
The enemy was putting his spin on our emotions and feelings. I don't really think Conrad is not helpful and he doesn't think I'm not grateful. But the devil was trying to convince us of these things. He was trying to sneak into our minds. This wasn't a blatant attack, but it could have gotten out of control without serious prayer and communication.
So the moral of the story is- The devil is sneaky and sly. Being aware of him and his attacks, no matter how 'small' they are is key to protecting our marriage. We need to focus on spending time with God, and communicating with each other regularly.
Lesson 1 down. Many more to come, I'm sure.